Is Ryle’s Narcissistic Tendencies the Secret to His Unpredictable Love in ‘It Ends With Us’-

by liuqiyue

Is Ryle a Narcissist in “It Ends with Us”?

In the heart-wrenching novel “It Ends with Us” by Colleen Hoover, the protagonist, Ryle, presents a complex character that raises questions about his personality and mental health. One of the most pressing questions that readers often ponder is whether Ryle can be classified as a narcissist. This article aims to explore this issue, examining Ryle’s behavior, motivations, and relationships to determine if he truly fits the narcissistic mold.

Ryle’s narcissistic tendencies become apparent through his self-centered actions and priorities. He consistently places his own needs and desires above those of others, which can be seen in his relationship with his wife, Lowen. Throughout the novel, Ryle exhibits a lack of empathy and concern for Lowen’s feelings and well-being. Instead, he focuses on his own happiness and the pursuit of his career goals, often at the expense of their marriage.

One of the hallmark traits of narcissism is a sense of entitlement, and Ryle’s behavior in “It Ends with Us” aligns with this characteristic. He expects Lowen to be there for him unconditionally, supporting his choices and aspirations without question. When she dares to express her own needs and desires, Ryle becomes angry and dismissive, showing a disregard for her feelings and the importance of their relationship.

Furthermore, Ryle’s narcissistic tendencies are also evident in his treatment of others outside of his marriage. He has a history of manipulating and exploiting people in his professional and personal life, often using his charm and intellect to gain control over them. This behavior is reminiscent of a classic narcissist, who often feels superior to others and believes they are entitled to their power and influence.

However, it is essential to note that while Ryle exhibits some narcissistic traits, he is not a full-blown narcissist. His behavior is more accurately described as narcissistic abuse, where he exploits and manipulates others for his own gain. This distinction is crucial, as it implies that Ryle’s narcissistic tendencies are rooted in his past trauma and experiences, rather than a deeply ingrained personality disorder.

The underlying issue in Ryle’s behavior is his inability to form healthy relationships and connect with others on an emotional level. His narcissistic tendencies are a coping mechanism for his pain and insecurities, which stem from his difficult upbringing and past traumas. By understanding Ryle’s background and the root causes of his behavior, readers can gain empathy for his character and recognize the complexities of his situation.

In conclusion, while Ryle’s behavior in “It Ends with Us” exhibits some narcissistic traits, it is more accurate to describe him as a victim of narcissistic abuse rather than a full-blown narcissist. His past trauma and inability to form healthy relationships are the root causes of his self-centered actions and priorities. By delving into Ryle’s character, readers can gain a deeper understanding of the complexities of narcissism and its impact on individuals and relationships.

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